Chaos, Hope, and Love

I sit here before you a broken woman. My heart cracked, chipped and scratched. My dream job ripped from my hands.
But I must eke a life out of the chaos - faith, hope and love will carry me through. What choice do I have?
My real fear is that I will never leave Holland. It's not that Holland is a bad place. It's a great place to raise children but I don't have children. I'm not even married. Ergo Holland not such a good place to live for me.
I have to remind myself I didn't give up when my first mentor told me that I could never be a daily reporter because I was dyslexic. Yes, boys and girls I am truly dyslexic - I recently could "see" the different between council and counsel. They had always looked the same until this week when something just didn't seem right with a sentence in my story. I looked up council in the dictionary and saw a reference to counsel. Slowly I wrote each word out and said them a couple dozen times over and over again making sure to annunciate each as I moved my finger from letter to letter.
I have to remind myself that I didn't give up then or any of the other times someone told me that I couldn't do something. I have to remember that I have always worked harder than anyone else and that is one of my greatest gift. And everyday I learn more I become a better reporter and writer.
But not all was lost, hopefully. I got some good advice. And hopefully in a few weeks I will have a better idea of the steps I need to take to get closer to my "dream job."
At least that's what I tell myself to help me get through the night.